One of the rarely discussed challenges that people with cancer can face is the pressure to remain positive. But it’s difficult to smile all the time, especially when going through something as traumatic as cancer. Kate Bowler, a survivor of stage 4 colon cancer, refers to this phenomenon as “bright-siding.”
“I hate the bright-siding because I would never want someone who’s suffering to feel the burden of positivity,” Bowler said. Bowler is a historian and associate professor at Duke Divinity School who studies a form of Christianity nicknamed “the prosperity gospel.”
RELATED: Survivor Details the Incredible Role Faith Played in Her Breast Cancer Journey
She said that her own faith during the cancer journey acted as something of a blessing and a curse — she wanted to believe that she would recover, but she at times felt as if she were not being positive enough.
“A lot of people of faith [made me feel I was being] unfaithful or not having tried hard enough spiritually,” Bowler says. “I felt a lot of the blame of being both sick and apparently a failure.”
But spirituality cuts both ways, she says, and she was lifted up by the faith and support of her community.
People “remade me in a way I didn’t realize I needed. I’d wake up and see their faces and see all of a sudden I was wearing adorable socks they’d bought me and a quilt somebody had embroidered me over night with words of encouragement, and I felt put back together,” she says.
A lesson she learned, she says, was to accept that sometimes you just don’t know what’s going to happen to you.
“I am learning to live and to love without reasons and assurances that nothing will be lost,” she says.
Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.
One of the rarely discussed challenges that people with cancer can face is the pressure to remain positive. But it’s difficult to smile all the time, especially when going through something as traumatic as cancer. Kate Bowler, a survivor of stage 4 colon cancer, refers to this phenomenon as “bright-siding.”
“I hate the bright-siding because I would never want someone who’s suffering to feel the burden of positivity,” Bowler said. Bowler is a historian and associate professor at Duke Divinity School who studies a form of Christianity nicknamed “the prosperity gospel.”
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RELATED: Survivor Details the Incredible Role Faith Played in Her Breast Cancer Journey
She said that her own faith during the cancer journey acted as something of a blessing and a curse — she wanted to believe that she would recover, but she at times felt as if she were not being positive enough.
“A lot of people of faith [made me feel I was being] unfaithful or not having tried hard enough spiritually,” Bowler says. “I felt a lot of the blame of being both sick and apparently a failure.”
But spirituality cuts both ways, she says, and she was lifted up by the faith and support of her community.
People “remade me in a way I didn’t realize I needed. I’d wake up and see their faces and see all of a sudden I was wearing adorable socks they’d bought me and a quilt somebody had embroidered me over night with words of encouragement, and I felt put back together,” she says.
A lesson she learned, she says, was to accept that sometimes you just don’t know what’s going to happen to you.
“I am learning to live and to love without reasons and assurances that nothing will be lost,” she says.
Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.