Actor Christopher Reeve’s Children Reveal “Love Language” With Their ‘Superman’ Dad– Beautiful & Heartbreaking Look at Life With Their With Their Dad After Accident Left Him Paralyzed

During a recent conversation about the new documentary, with TheWrap’s Sundance Portrait and Interview Studio presented by NFP,” Reeve’s youngest son Will said, “You might think you know Superman, or the advocate, or whatever version of Christopher Reeve you think you know, but then you get to see him as a dad.

His sister Alexandra said, “One of the joys is that they uncovered so much archival footage. So there’s the outtakes from the original audition for Superman, interviews with dad from the ’70s and ’80s when we were still young kids.

“Seeing him at the height of fame and even old home movies we hadn’t spent much time with – suddenly we’re uncovering these moments and seeing them on the big screen. All of that woven together has been really beautiful and powerful.”

Referring to how their mom, who became their dad’s caretaker and ultimately passed from lung cancer, was also featured in the filmReeve’s eldest son Matthew, said, “The most emotionally stirring parts in the film are the interviews and hearing them talk about their experiences with our dad and Dana. It was important to step back and let the filmmakers do their thing to properly do historical justice with that element of objectivity.

“What I’m just beyond touched by and so proud of is the way that the filmmakers tell my mom’s story, the way that my mom Dana features in this documentary, because she featured so heavily as you might expect in our lives. As much of an honor as it is to be the son of Christopher Reeve, I’m also the son of Dana Reeve,” Will Reeve added. “Anytime I can tell her story and share with the world what a singular force she was makes me so proud.”

Will also spoke with Variety during a Zoom interview, alongside about his siblings Matthew and Alexa, recounting how their dad’s life changed drastically following the accident, saying, “His morning routine from waking up to being able to roll out the door was about two hours. We’d all wake up every morning and think anything could happen. But he would wake up and then remember all over again that he couldn’t move.”

The siblings also explained how their dad, prior to his accident, took them skiing to express his love, with Alexandra telling Variety, “Our love language was activity before. Suddenly, you’re spending time just hanging out in dad’s office looking each other in the eye and talking for two hours.”

Alexandra also praised her dad on being a hero to all, both on the camera and off, especially following his tragic accident.

“I think he was very conscious of that irony and the legacy of ‘Superman’ when people viewed his story and thought about him after the accident,” she explained. “He talked about redefining what it is to be a hero… it’s an everyday person who survives despite overwhelming obstacles.”

Reeve’s son Matthew also opened up to People about how his dad’s “absolutely incredible” Oscars appearance and the applause from the audience following his accident.

During the premiere of his dad’s new documentary, Matthew exclusively told People, “I remember I was in London, it was a school night and we stayed up until three or four in the morning to watch it. And it was absolutely incredible.

“And what sticks with me most was after that incredible warm welcome and that very long ovation that he received, his introduction – he followed it up with a wonderful speech about how cinema and movies are at their best when they not only entertain, but they inform and educate and address issues.”

We’re delighted Reeve’s children are sharing his story as its a wonderful example of how people can make the most out of life despite hardship.

After Reeve’s death, his wife carried out their commitment to the Christopher & Dana Reeve Foundation, which is devoted to finding new treatments for paralysis, such as stem cells.

Remembering Tragic ‘Super’ Couple Christopher And Dana Reeve– Finally Some Progress For Paralysis & Lung Cancer

Dana had her own unfortunate death from lung cancer in 2006 at the age of 44.

Resilience Through Adversity

We love how Christopher Reeve’s genuine heroism could be seen from his family and friends following his accident, which is why we’d like to point out how SurvivorNet specializes in covering the lives of people who overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles. Often, seeing the positive helps them maintain their resilience.

WATCH: Defining and Building Resilience

Dr. Zuri Murrell, an oncologist at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, previously spoke to SurvivorNet about the role of a positive outlook on survival rates, saying, “I’m pretty good at telling what kind of patient are going to still have this attitude and probably going to live the longest, even with bad, bad disease. And those are patients who, they have gratitude in life.”

Resilience is an important trait, but not the easiest to build. The ultimate goal is not to avoid tough times, but to be able to bounce back from them. And yet, when they are faced with an overwhelming, life-changing situation, how do people shift their view? How do they learn to see the problem as temporary, rather than permanent, and figure out a solution?

It’s complicated, because building resilience is more about your mental and emotional fortitude than anything else. According to the American Psychological Association, “the resources and skills associated with more positive adaptation (i.e., greater resilience) can be cultivated and practiced.” In other words, resilience is not something you’re born with, which should be encouraging. Instead, after every challenge in your life, you build more and more resilience to those hard times.

You can build resilience the way you build muscle – through patience and steady exercise of the skill. Here are some lessons taken from Fischer, Runkel, and Soller, all who have spoke with SurvivorNet in earlier interviews.

• Be willing to learn. If one way doesn’t work, find a different way. If an obstacle lands in your way, build a path around it or over it. In Resilience, one of the athletes says, “You always have to be learning. Otherwise, life gets stagnant.” The more you learn, the more you grow and growth is a sign of resilience.
• Spend time with people who inspire you. Our world is filled with people who overcome challenges, and their success can energize you to overcome your own. Think about famous people who hava faced adversity and did not give up Stephen King actually threw his manuscript, Carrie, in the trash because it had been rejected by publishers so many times. His wife encouraged him to keep sending it out, and he finally sold it in 1974 launching a massively successful career as a novelist. Take the time to read and learn about the lives of Helen Keller, Jackie Robinson, Bethany Hamilton, Nelson Mandela, and others.
• Allow yourself to grieve. Don’t push away or dismiss your frustration and sadness. Ben Fischer says that life can be filled with lots of crying, but “Those cries make us stronger.”
• Be flexible. Abandon the idea that there is only one solution or that you must stick to your original plan. The best solution or plan is the one that eventually works. You may need to change your original plan as the circumstances change.
• Lean in to your community. Your friends, colleagues, and family are invaluable, and when you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed by a problem, their support can carry you. The Harvard Study of Adult Development is the longest study of human well-being. Many news outlets have covered its results, which show that maintaining strong, healthy relationships helped people live longer lives.   Psychiatrist and author Dr. Samantha Boardman tells SurvivorNet that connecting with and contributing to the lives of other people are two of “the three wellsprings of vitality” (the third is feeling positively challenged).

Facing Cancer: How to Turn Stress into Strength

If you’ve been through a difficult health challenge or any type of adversity throughout your live,  Dr. Boardman told SurvivorNet in an earlier interview that one way to get your mental health back in check after a diagnosis is to try to play up your strengths.

“I sometimes will ask patients, tell me about yourself when you were at your best,” she explained. “Using that story, trying to figure out what strengths come to mind. Is it patience? Is it appreciation of beauty? It is perseverance? [Then we can] use those strengths in constructive ways to navigate their cancer journey.”

Dr. Boardman says another way to approach harnessing the strength you already have is by tapping into your values. This could be family, close friendships, spirituality, or commitment to a healthy lifestyle.

Reminding yourself of what your values are and how you are living accordingly is another way to unleash that inner strength.

Lastly, patients shouldn’t underestimate the value of simply opening up, Dr. Boardman says. This could mean speaking to a close family member or friend, or it could mean seeking support in other ways by finding a therapist that meets your needs or looking into joining a support group.

Stay Positive, It Matters

Having negative feelings throughout a health struggle is to be expected, however, doctors will tell you that people who find a way to work through the emotions and stay positive tend to have better outcomes.

Coping After Losing A Parent To Cancer

Everyone goes through the stages of grief at their own pace. When you lose a parent to cancer, like the Reeve’s siblings experienced when their mom passed from lung cancer, that feeling of loss and sadness can really linger. But that doesn’t necessarily have to be a bad thing.

RELATED: Actor Christopher Reeve’s Wife Diagnosed With Lung Cancer at 43. The New Young Female Lung Cancer Boom

Camila Legaspi lost her mom to breast cancer when she was in high school, and told previously told SurvivorNet that the tragedy of losing a parent as a teenager kind of defined her high school experience.

Sadness Isn’t Always a Bad Thing: Learning How To Cope With Grief

However, after she went off to college, she was able to turn that immense sense of loss that she felt into inspiration for creating.

“I actually took this sadness and let it motivate me,” Camila, 23, told SurvivorNet. “I learned that it’s OK to be sad sometimes. It’s OK to carry sadness with you … it’s not always a bad thing. It makes you who you are and it gives you a story to tell and it helps you teach other people to cope with their sadness.”

Camila, who is one of four siblings, said that her mother was a very creative person. She said she turned to writing as an outlet, and used her mother’s creativity as a motivator. Camila went to Princeton University, and got involved with the school’s magazine. She explained that instead of thinking of the loss of her mother as something terrible that happened to her family, she has let it serve as inspiration for poetry, fiction, or whatever else she may be inspired to write.

“I’ve learned to have it impact me in a positive way, and have it not just be a sad story … instead, I’m using it for a better purpose,” Camila said.

Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff

Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.

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