SNTV Presents: ‘SN & You – Veterans & Prostate Cancer: Providing Emotional Support'
- SurvivorNetTV presents ‘Veterans and Prostate Cancer: Providing Emotional Support’ from our original series SN & You, which shares cancer survivors’ stories from the perspective of military men diagnosed with prostate cancer.
- The episode delves into what it’s like for men diagnosed with prostate cancer and the uncertainties surrounding their diagnosis, including how to talk about it with loved ones openly.
- As a prostate cancer patient, your sex life may be impacted depending on your course of treatment. This episode discusses how to navigate sensitive conversations such as sex and offers helpful tips on how to maintain intimacy after a diagnosis.
- Cancer patients tend to do well emotionally and physically if surrounded by a supportive team of people, including doctors, mental health professionals, and, most notably, beloved family and friends. This powerful group of people can help you while undergoing treatment or chipping in with everyday responsibilities such as running daily errands to make your life easier.
The Power of Support
Retired Naval Commander Mike Crosby, 63, is a prostate cancer survivor. He beat cancer three times and now uses his experience as a survivor to encourage other veterans diagnosed with prostate cancer. He credits his ability to persevere with the unyielding support from his wife while battling cancer.“It’s not just a man’s disease because you’ve got your wife right there who has been your supporter, she’s been your lover, she’s been your partner for years typically, and all that’s going to change instantly when you’re told that you have prostate cancer. And we have to address that. We have to address the impact that those simple words or that simple diagnosis has on this couple because now you’re going to deal with her. She never signed up to be a caretaker,” Crosby said.
Read MoreOne of the benefits of having supporters includes helping alleviate stress and anxiety following your diagnosis. Supporters can also help advocate for you during treatment.
How to Maintain Intimacy as a Prostate Cancer Patient
After a prostate cancer diagnosis, your sex life may be impacted significantly if your treatment comes with side effects like erectile dysfunction or reduces your desire to have sex.
“After prostate cancer, one of the biggest things that people talk about is how it’s changed their sex life, both their interest in sex, but also being able to have sex like you used to. This can be a huge stressor for a person’s relationships. And so, how do you start talking about it with your partner, or perhaps you’re dating? When do I bring it up?” Dr. Christie said.
RELATED: Sex Is Possible After Prostate Cancer and 5 Other Facts You Should Know
“Are you willing to have sex in a different way that you might have to use a pill, use a device? Yes, that’s a change. Does that make you feel like less of a man? For some people, it does, and that can be that initial wall that you hit. Part of it is figuring out how many times you’re going to run into that wall until you’re willing to try a different strategy,” Dr. Christie added.
RELATED: VA Care Insights: Sexual Function Recovery After Prostate Cancer Surgery
Coping With Fear After a Diagnosis
Once you’ve been diagnosed with cancer, you’re likely to be consumed with a wide range of emotions. Among the list of emotions you may feel is fear.
“There’s fear, there’s anger, there’s depression, there’s wonderment about why you ask a lot of times why it happened to me, but fear does enter into it,” Crosby said.
“Something that comes up a lot for people is a fear of being a burden. Not wanting to burden people, not wanting to interrupt anyone else’s life,” Dr. Christie said.
However, the fear Crosby speaks of can hinder additional support for the patient because they may be less likely to explain what’s going on fully.
“What ends up often happening and is exactly the opposite of what people are wanting is the more people hold in and not share, that’s what becomes a burden, because your family, your friends, they can tell that something is going on, something has changed. And by not knowing what it is, it creates distance. And people end up sort of tiptoeing around each other. They want to be able to check in, they want to be able to help, but they don’t know what’s allowed,” Dr. Christie explained.
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