Second Chance: HGTV Star Tarek El Moussa, 42, Says He Drank 20 Shots of Vodka at Once– How He Tuned His life Around

The loving dad, who welcomed his third child earlier this year with his second wife “Selling Sunset” star Heather Rae El Moussa, writes, “I will never forget this day… or this kid. I was 20 years old fishing for King salmon in Alaska. Unfortunately, all I remember was the terrible hangover I had. I had drank over 30 shots of vodka and whatever else I could get my hands on. I can still feel the throbbing in my head and the pulsing vein on my temple. But…I was pretty used to it since I was drinking my life away anyways.

“Most people don’t know this about me, but at 19 my life went downhill in what felt like over night. I gained 50 pounds, lost my confidence, lost my hope, and became a raging alcoholic. All my drive was gone. It’s crazy to think today I sometimes wake up at 3am to start work, when at 20, I would wake up at 3pm to start my day.”

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tarek El Moussa (@therealtarekelmoussa)

The American real-estate investor concluded, “We all deserve a second chance. If any of this sounds like you, it may be time to Flip Your Life too! I know you can do it, because I did it. And if you are looking for the help I desperately needed at that time, check out my new book Flip Your Life.

RELATED: Alcohol Consumption Increases Cancer Risk. Less Booze Is Associated With Lower Cancer Risk, New Data Adds To The Case For Moderation

“I wrote it thinking about 20 year old Tarek and what could have helped him. You can preorder now by clicking the link in my bio, and it will be available on February 6th!”

In an earlier post, El Moussa promoted his new book “Flip Your Life,” which is now available for preorder.

Alongside a photo of his new book cover, El Moussa wrote, “I’ve spent the past 7 years writing this book and it’s a very personal one for me. I share my entire journey and all of the struggles that have accompanied it such as cancers, divorce, addiction, business struggles, and more.

“I put my heart and soul into this book and got really vulnerable with it, so I hope you enjoy it as much as I did writing it.”

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tarek El Moussa (@therealtarekelmoussa)

Tarek El Moussa’s Experience With Cancer

Life took a turn for El Moussa in 2013 when he was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. His thyroid cancer diagnosis came after an HGTV fan, who also happened to be a nurse, noticed a lump on his throat while watching him on television. She contacted the network, telling them what she had seen.

According to the National Cancer Institute, thyroid cancer occurs when cancer cells form in the tissues of the thyroid gland. The thyroid is located at the base of the neck and produces hormones that regulate your heart rate, blood pressure, body temperature, and weight. A lump or swelling in the neck is a common symptom of this type of cancer.

Then, in 2017, he was diagnosed with testicular cancer.

Symptoms for testicular cancer may include “swelling or discomfort in the scrotum,” according to the National Cancer Institute. El Moussa worried that the cancer would impact his fertility since he had one of his testicles removed during treatment. Testicular cancer survivors may encounter fertility issues after overcoming the disease, but this is not always the case.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tarek El Moussa (@therealtarekelmoussa)

“Testicular cancer commonly occurs from ages 20-45, but it can occur at any age,” Dana-Farber medical oncologist Dr. Bradley McGregor previously told SurvivorNet.

During a 2017 interview with PEOPLE magazine, Tarek said of the experience: “I was at one building doing my thyroid stuff, and mentioned I was going across the street to get an ultrasound done. I’ll never forget the doctor joking, ‘I hope you don’t have cancer!'”

The treatment path for both types of cancers depends upon the stage at which the cancer is diagnosed. Common treatments for testicular cancer include chemotherapy, surgery and radiation. Treatments for thyroid cancer can include surgery, hormone therapy, radioactive iodine, radiation and, in some cases, chemotherapy.

Luckily, El Moussa was given the “all clear” and often shares his story to raise awareness on both diseases, while radiating positivity to those in need.

View this post on Instagram

A post shared by Tarek El Moussa (@therealtarekelmoussa)

In a celebratory Instagram post on March 14, 2019, El Moussa wrote, “Today I got the best news ever…I’m cancer free and I’m healthier than ever!!!!

“This makes me so happy not for me but for my babies. I have to be healthy and alive for them!! (I’m tearing up writing this)  Ugh…they are my everything and they need their daddy! This news is so good because I’m alive to be here for THEM!!”

He continued, “From the bottom of my heart I love all of you. I read all your comments and feel like I know so many of you. You have followed me so long I’d probably recognize you on the street. I’m saying this because I appreciate you and all of your support…thank you again from the bottom of my heart.”

Insomnia, Pain Tolerance, and Anxiety: Addressing Your Unmet Mental Health Needs

‘Alcoholism Is a Disease’

It’s great to see Tarek El Moussa thriving after hardship, especially alcoholism. TV news journalist Elizabeth Vargas also understands the struggle of alcoholism and recently spoke with SurvivorNet on how she was able to overcome addiction and learn from her past.

Comparing alcoholism recovery to battling cancer, Vargas stressed that the outlook on both should be similar, but both health issues are viewed differently.

TV News Anchor Elizabeth Vargas Wants You To Know Anxiety & Issues With Alcohol Are Surmountable– How She Learned To Cope– A Remarkable Story of Strength & Resilience

“Relapse is part of recovery. If getting sober or getting clean from a substance was that easy, we wouldn’t have the issue of addiction in this country. People relapse because it’s hard. It’s really hard. And I think all too often, families, companies, corporations, friends, and colleagues are too fast to say, you relapsed, you’re out, you’re done. We don’t tell somebody who has cancer when the cancer comes back, oh, sorry, no more chemo. But many companies, many families say, no more treatment,” Vargas says.

“You relapsed. You’re hopeless. You don’t want to get better. You won’t try hard enough. And that’s the kind of thinking I think we need to change. And that’s why there’s so much stigma around the disease of substance use disorder.”

Vargas, who is now sober, says she loves her two sons very much and would “die for them” but said that alcoholism is so “powerful” and hard to combat that she “couldn’t stop drinking for them” before seeking help.

After Cancer, It Felt Like a Second Chance to Get This Life Done Right

The beloved journalist stressed the importance of communication regarding health issues and mental health. She thinks people should talk about drug and alcohol addiction like other conditions, for example, diabetes, saying, “We have an opioid crisis right now killing record numbers of people in this country. We have to look at drug addiction differently in order to help people get clean.”

As for dealing with alcoholism amid her career, Vargas labeled herself as “highly functioning.” In fact, her former ABC News colleague, George Stephanopoulos, told her in an interview that he “never suspected” she was battling something like this.

Noting how alcoholism looks different for everyone, she tells us, “That’s the fallacy for people who say, oh, people who are addicted to drugs or alcohol have no self-discipline. I was a model of self-discipline. I worked out every day. I ate healthy.

“But you can’t self-discipline your way into sobriety or out of addiction because it’s not about self-discipline. But for me, it allowed me to buy into all those cliches that an alcoholic is some guy under a bridge with a whiskey bottle and a brown paper bag or some messy woman falling on the floor of the restaurant with her makeup smeared all over her face. And I could say, well, I’m not those, so I can’t be that. And that’s just not true.”

RELATED: Does Alcohol Impact the Risks for Colon and Other Cancers?

Overcoming Adversity

Overcoming adversity can seem daunting, but Tarek El Moussa’s experience certainly offers hope for anyone going through similar struggles, like addiction and alcoholism. Many people think reciting upbeat mottos or pretending to be cheerful will help, but these solutions can make someone feel even more dejected than before. Instead, pay attention to the following steps to make meaningful change.

1. Set a goal. No matter what the situation, create a new goal for yourself. If you have just been diagnosed with cancer or a chronic illness, perhaps one goal would be to educate yourself about the disease and the possible treatments as much as possible.

Adversity And The Art of Happiness: How Hardship Makes You Even Stronger

2. Make a plan. How will you achieve this goal? Your plan will help you focus on that goal. Dr. Siddhartha Ganguly refers to this determined, focused mindset as “the eye of the tiger,” which can help people dealing with health problems, such as lymphoma and other cancers. “You have to have the eye of the tiger to go through this grueling process that is necessary these days to get rid of these virulent and aggressive cancers,” Dr. Ganguly, a cancer specialist at Houston Methodist, told SurvivorNet in an earlier interview.

3. Rely on others. Spend time with people who show you unconditional support and encouragement. They will alleviate your stress and help you remember that you’re not alone in this! Dr. Samantha Boardman, a psychiatrist and author, previously told SurvivorNet that one “coping strategy that can be productive is reaching out and talking to others. Having support we know is really critical in the healing process.”

4. Use positive self-talk. Leave messages with affirmations in places you frequent. Put notes around your mirror or the computer screen that say “You got this!” or “Keep going!” Cut out inspirational quotes from people you admire and surround yourself with their words. Dr. Boardman explained to SurvivorNet that “Positive emotions have unique benefits above and beyond managing negative emotions.”

Mental Health: Critical Knowledge

The term mental health refers to both our emotional and psychological well-being. Our mental health can affect how we think, feel, and behave. Certain triggers like stress, traumatic events, or changes in your physical health can affect mental health. It’s really important to keep tabs on your mental health and, if necessary, seek treatment. This doesn’t necessarily mean traditional therapy because while it may be really helpful (even life-changing) for some, that doesn’t mean it’s for everyone.

Problems with mood and overall mental well-being can be attributed to several factors. For some people, it’s genetic, while others may be experiencing a response to some sort of stressor or past trauma.

How to Fix Relationships When Depression Hits – A Survivor’s Guide

In order to keep your mental health in check, it’s important to be aware of signs that can be subtle that there is something affecting your mind. These signs include:

• A change in eating or sleeping habits
• Losing interest in people or usual activities
• Experiencing little or no energy
• Numb and/or hopeless feelings
• Turning to drinking or drugs more than usual
• Non-typical angry, upset, or on-edge feelings
• Yelling/fighting with loved ones
• Experiencing mood swings
• Intrusive thoughts
• Trouble getting through daily tasks

Dr. Samantha Boardman, a New York-based psychologist, Explains How To Be “Realistically Optimistic” When Learning To Cop With Mental Health Struggles 

These symptoms can be wide-ranging and vary greatly from person to person. Everyone experiences grief differently, for example. However, if you are feeling unusually sad, on edge, or like you’re no longer interested in activities you used to love, know that there are many treatment options available and many different healthy ways to help you cope.

Coping With Depression

Dr. Scott Irwin, a psychiatrist and Director of Supportive Care Services at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, says it’s crucial for patients to talk to their care team about their mental health.

“We all get depressed from time to time, have a sad day, feeling down and blue – that’s part of normal human emotion, part of normal life,” Dr. Irwin explained.

“Some of us, when we’re dealing with difficult things such as a diagnosis of cancer, may be sad or down or blue more often. And sometimes it gets to the point where that depression can be a little bit overwhelming, and we help them through therapy, through non-medication interventions.”

There are many ways to address mental health issues as a cancer survivor. Options may include:

• Meditation
• Practicing mindfulness
• Talking with a therapist
• Joining a support group
• Medication, such as antidepressants

Medication

When doctors and patients together decide that medication is necessary, it’s important that doctors choose wisely.

“I often try to choose medications with the lowest side effect profile,” Dr. Irwin said. “If patients are getting hormonal therapy, there are particular antidepressants that we can’t use because they may lower the effectiveness of that hormonal therapy, and so we choose antidepressants that don’t impact the cancer care.”

This shows how important it is to communicate with everyone you’re seeing so they can be on the same page about your treatment and options.

Dealing With Grief Related to Health Problems

Another way doctors can tailor mental health medications for their patients is through genetic testing.

Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik says genetic testing through companies like Genomind can help doctors understand how likely it is a patient may respond to different types of psychiatric medications.

“Doing the genetic testing has absolutely transformed the landscape of psycho-pharmacology,” Dr. Plutchik told SurvivorNet. “It’s something that I highly recommend for anybody who is taking medication, whether they are being treated for cancer or not.”

WATCH: Marianne Duquette Cuozzo Shares How Art Helped Her Through Dark Times

Dr. Plutchik also explained that genetic testing can be specifically helpful for cancer patients because it may help avoid trial and error when it comes to choosing a mental health medication that does not interfere with their cancer treatment.

“So, a person who is dealing with this and may have to go on chemotherapy has already enough on their plate that they don’t really want to start dealing with trial and error with medications,” she said. “So, it gives me information about which medications are likely to work without having problematic side effects, and it also gives information about interactions between any of the psych medications that we choose and the chemotherapy agents that they may be taking.”

Support Groups

Whether you’re coping with an illness, an emotional problem, or a life transition, a support group can be a place where people in the same boat or in a similar situation can come together.

But maybe you’re a little unsure or skeptical about joining a group. What will it be like? Are you expected to share your story?

Dr. Amy McNally, gynecologic oncologist with Minnesota Oncology, tries to reassure her patients that chances are they’ll derive some benefit.

“I think in a support group, you’re going to find women who are in similar situations but yet can share their unique stories,” she says. “Just being there is worth it. You don’t have to share a thing. You can just sit and listen, or you can be part of the conversation and offer your thoughts. And it can be different every time you go; it’s your choice as to how or whether to participate and what you decide to get out of the group.”

McNally thinks it can be helpful and comforting to be around people who know what you’ve been through or are going through, and that in and of itself is reason enough to try it out.

Therapy

“People that are struggling with coping with the experience, coping with body image should reach out to their doctors, find a therapist in the community,” says Dr. Irwin.

A patient navigator or social worker can also help connect you with a mental health professional that you can talk to to help process your emotions.

“It’s about meeting the individual patient where they are and their feelings, how they’ve always dealt with their body image, what the body image changes mean now in their lives and their relationships, and how they can move forward given the new reality,” Dr. Irwin said.

Mindfulness

Jon Kabat Zinn, founder of the eight-week stress-reduction program Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR), a course that has entered the mainstream of health care, scientific study, and public policy, describes mindfulness as “paying attention in a particular way: on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.”

Mindfulness is often suggested for cancer patients to reduce high levels of anxiety and distress associated with diagnosis, treatment, and anticipation of possible disease recurrence.

Both the American Society of Clinical Oncology and the Society of Integrative Oncology recommend meditation as part of a multidisciplinary approach to reduce stress, depression, and mood disturbance and to improve the quality of life in cancer patients. But the question remains: does it really work? We think it does.

Five tips for practicing mindfulness:

• Choose one daily activity to practice mindfully (e.g., eating your lunch, brushing your teeth, or taking a shower). During this activity, notice your breath and the activity of your mind for a few moments.
• Take a pause throughout your day. During your day, find a moment to stop and take five deep breaths with your eyes closed.
• Kindly acknowledge a moment you’re experiencing a difficulty by putting your hand on your heart and saying, “Feel my pain. How can I be kind to myself in this moment?”
• Get curious about your emotions. Experiment with welcoming your emotions as they come instead of pushing them away.
• Become aware when you’re in a rush. Ask yourself, “Do I really need to hurry?”

Meditation

Regularly meditating allows people to start to become more aware of the emotions in the physical body and the thoughts running through the mind, to acknowledge their thoughts as they arise, and then gently let them go.

Shannon Masur, a colon cancer and Lynch Syndrome survivor, describes this as “when a thought comes in, to feel it, feel the fear, but let it go after a few seconds.”

All of this is said to result in an overall reduction in stress and anxiety in the body. It may also help patients control problems such as pain, difficulty sleeping, tiredness, feeling sick, and high blood pressure.

For help getting started with meditation, here’s a guided session to try.

WATCH: A Guided Meditation for the SurvivorNet Community

Overall, don’t forget to prioritize your mental health if you’re facing cancer. You might feel like your mind is the least of your worries while fighting the disease, but it’s important to know just how big of an impact your mental well-being can have on your health as a whole.

“Actually, there’s data that if you have extra stress or depression, you may not recover, or you have a higher risk or recurrence,” Dr. Irwin said. “So… in treating the depression, we’re actually impacting the cancer care outcomes.”

Questions to Ask Your Doctor

If you are not feeling your usual self and are facing a diagnosis or some other traumatic event, you should consider contacting your doctor to see if your mental health needs a boost.

• Should I consider going on medication to help with mental health struggles?
• Would genetic testing help determine the best treatment for me?
• What is the likelihood that the test will recommend the proper treatment?
• What can we do if I don’t succeed with the recommended treatment?

Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff

Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.

---