When Life Shifts: Moving Through Grief With Strength
- ‘80s pop singer Taylor Dayne, 63, honored her late father, Jack Wunderman, crediting him for believing in her and funding the recording of her breakout hit “Tell It to My Heart.” Experts emphasize that grief moves in waves and doesn’t follow a linear path, encouraging compassion, support, and professional guidance when needed.
- Following her 2022 colon cancer diagnosis, Dayne had ten inches of her colon removed for treatment and overcame an infection following colon cancer surgery. She says, though the recovery was slow and painful, she came back “a fighter.”
- Advances in colon cancer care are increasingly powered by targeted therapies that use tumor biomarkers—distinct molecular patterns—to match patients with treatments designed specifically for their cancer.
- “We can start looking at people’s genetic mutations and think about how they might respond to different drugs,” Dr. Heather Yeo, a colorectal surgeon and surgical oncologist, explains.
- A colonoscopy uses a thin, flexible tube with a camera to inspect the colon and rectum for polyps. Polyps are small, noncancerous growths that can be removed during the procedure to prevent colorectal cancer from developing, according to colorectal cancer surgeon Dr. Zuri Murrell.
- Colorectal screenings are generally advised starting at age 45, but individuals with higher risk factors, such as a family history of colon cancer, may need earlier testing. Consulting a doctor about screening options is recommended.
Dayne, a colon cancer survivor, recently revealed that her dad, Jack Wunderman—who passed away not long ago—was the one who believed in her dreams enough to fund the recording of the song that changed her life.
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“He believed in me and loved me so wholly… He gave me the money in 1987 to produce and record ‘Tell It to My Heart.’ I’ll forever have his love… Daddy Dayne.”
Losing someone so foundational can shake the ground beneath you. Grief is often described through the “five stages”—denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance—but experts emphasize that these emotions don’t follow a straight line. They can overlap, repeat, or arrive unexpectedly. What matters is recognizing that each feeling is valid, meaningful, and temporary.
“Grief comes in waves,” explains Dr. Scott Irwin, a psychiatrist and Director of Supportive Care Services at Cedars-Sinai.
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“They’re grieving the change in their life; the future they had imagined is now different.” He notes that talk therapy and community support can be especially helpful during the hardest stretches.
Clinical psychologist Dr. Marianna Strongin echoes that perspective, reminding people that approaching grief with compassion and patience can help them reconnect with their own resilience. “If you approach these feelings with kindness and eventually acceptance, you will come away from this period more connected to your strength,” she wrote for SurvivorNet.
A Survivor’s Journey to Healing
As Dayne continues to grieve the loss of one of her most ardent supporters, this isn’t the first tough adversity she’s faced. Diagnosed with colon cancer, the Grammy-nominated singer previously found herself trading the international spotlight for hospital lights—and confronting her own mortality.
At the height of her career, she suddenly found herself facing uncertainty. She traveled to Hawaii after learning she needed major surgery, admitting later that she went there “to die,” unsure whether she would survive the removal of 10 inches of her colon.
But Hawaii became something else entirely—a place of reckoning, rest, and renewal. Surrounded by what she described as “the most loving, helping, and caring” people, Dayne found emotional healing that went far beyond the operating room. The community and her care team helped her rediscover purpose at a moment when she felt most vulnerable.
“[They helped] more than I could have ever figured out my purpose,” Dayne told Parade, reflecting on her decision to travel to the islands after receiving the diagnosis.
Now in remission, Dayne continues to tour, perform, and use her platform to advocate for early detection and routine cancer screenings. Even as she mourns her father, she carries forward the legacy of the man who believed in her before the world ever did.
Expert Resources for Colon Cancer Patients
Taylor’s Cancer Journey
When Dayne, a mother of two, is asked about her cancer journey, she often begins with a sense of gratitude that her cancer was caught early.
Dayne’s career skyrocketed in 1987 when her hit single “Tell It to My Heart” hit the airwaves. Her memorable music video was filled with staples of the 1980s, including choreographed dance moves, leather, and big hair. Other hits Dayne is best known for include “Prove Your Love” and “I’ll Always Love You.” She also dipped her toes into acting with the television series “Rude Awakening.”
Her cancer journey began in the summer of 2022 when she was diagnosed with colon cancer. Colon or colorectal cancer affects your large intestine (colon) or the end of your intestine (rectum). Her cancer was discovered following a routine colonoscopy.
“I develop polyps, so I had been getting them checked every six months,” Dayne told the Atlanta Journal-Constitution.
“During one of those times, they found a very aggressive polyp,” she further explained.
A colonoscopy is a procedure doctors use to screen for colon cancer by looking inside the colon.
WATCH: Understanding a colonoscopy
This procedure requires your colon to be “cleaned out.” To clear out your colon, your doctor will prescribe a “bowel prep,” a liquid you drink the night before the procedure. The prep acts as a laxative that causes you to have multiple loose stools before your procedure.
Once your colon is cleared out, the gastroenterologist performing the procedure can have a clear look to evaluate if any polyps or masses are present.
Depending on the size and number of polyps found, it is recommended that patients undergo a repeat colonoscopy within three to five years.
Dr. Zuri Murrell, a colorectal cancer surgeon and Director of the Cedars-Sinai Colorectal Cancer Center, previously explained the colonoscopy procedure to SurvivorNet.
“When we see a polyp, we actually physically take the polyp out through the colonoscope,” he explained.
“What does that mean? That means we basically put a wire through with a little bit of a flange at the end, and we pull the polyp out. Now, note that there is no pain with that. Inside the colon, there are no pain fibers, so there’s no pain,” Dr. Murrell added.
The advantage of a colonoscopy is that your doctor can remove any polyps found during the test. Many colon cancers can be caught on a colonoscopy before they develop or when the polyps are small enough to be removed without surgery.
Dayne said during a “Good Morning America” interview that when her doctor told her she had cancer, it was difficult to process.
“I didn’t take it in,” Dayne said.
When you’re diagnosed with cancer, it’s normal to feel overwhelmed with emotions. According to psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik, cancer patients’ emotions can range from anger to sadness and fear in a short span of time.
“The patient or person going through the stressful event should accept that emotions will be fluid. You may feel fine one day and then feel a massive wave of stress the next. It’s also important for those you look to for support, whether that’s a therapist, friends, and family, or both, to understand the fluidity of stress-related emotions,” Dr. Plutchik said.
Dayne revealed that as a child, she spent a lot of time in the hospital, so she learned to take good care of herself as she grew older. She regularly receives colonoscopies after her doctors previously found benign polyps during previous colonoscopies.
Dayne says that upon her diagnosis, her doctor “never even said the stage” but stressed that the cancer was detected early.
She treated her colon cancer by getting surgery, which removed 10 inches of her colon.
She told ABC News that after the procedure, she was declared “cancer-free.”
As the ‘80s singer was recovering from her surgery, she suffered an infection.
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“I was pretty much gutted right down the center. Then I had an infection. When you’re cut open, that can happen. I had issues around my spleen and pancreas. My recovery was slow. I just had to find the right antibiotics to cut the cancer out. I was very sick,” Dayne admitted.
She did not need chemotherapy, which involves cancer-killing drugs, or radiation therapy, which involves using high-energy beams such as X-rays aimed at cancer cells, hoping to kill them.
“I came back a fighter. I had ketamine treatments (which treat depression, anxiety, and PTSD). My body was so traumatized. I was in so much pain for so many months. I feel bad for people who are much older than me who can’t get through this,” Dayne said.
After recovering, Dayne says she’s more mindful about what she eats, adding, “I need stamina so I can be me on stage.”
Colon Cancer Is Treatable and Curable When Caught Early
Colon cancer is very treatable and curable if caught early. Colon cancer screenings can involve at-home tests such as Cologuard, but a colonoscopy is more effective, according to SurvivorNet experts.
The cancer starts when abnormal lumps called polyps grow in the colon or rectum. It takes up to 10 years for a colon polyp to become full-blown cancer, according to SurvivorNet experts.
When you have a colonoscopy, the gastroenterologist looks for polyps inside your intestine. Although polyps can’t be felt, they can be picked up by screening tests before they cause a problem, such as colon or rectal (colorectal) cancer.
A polyp found during a colonoscopy can be removed, which can prevent the development of cancer. Almost all polyps that are removed are precancerous, meaning that they have not yet progressed to cancer.
The American Gastrointestinal Association lowered the recommended initial age for a colorectal screening from 50 to 45. However, experts recommend screening earlier for some people who may be at an increased risk of developing colon cancer, such as those with a family history of the disease.
WATCH: Debunking misconceptions about colon cancer.
The most poignant signature of colon cancer is a change in bowel habits. Changes in the size or shape of bowel movements may cause constipation or diarrhea. A change in stool color, particularly black or tarry stools, can indicate bleeding from a tumor deep in the colon.
Other symptoms can be harder to pinpoint, such as abdominal pain and unintentional weight loss. Finally, some tumors bleed a small amount over a long period of time, resulting in anemia (low red blood cell count) that is picked up on blood work.
A Colonoscopy Explained
A colonoscopy is a screening test that allows doctors to examine the inside of the colon for signs of cancer or other abnormalities.
To prepare, the colon must be completely emptied. Your doctor will prescribe a bowel prep—a liquid solution taken the night before—that works as a strong laxative and triggers multiple loose stools to clear the colon.
With the colon clean, the gastroenterologist can carefully inspect the lining and remove or evaluate any polyps or suspicious areas.
Follow‑up timing depends on what’s found. If polyps are present, especially larger or multiple ones, doctors typically recommend repeating the colonoscopy in three to five years.
WATCH: What Doctors Look for During Colonoscopies
What Treatment Options Exist for Colon Cancer?
“There are a lot of advances being made in colorectal cancer,” Dr. Yeo previously told SurvivorNet.
Colon cancer treatment is more targeted, meaning doctors often test for specific changes or genetic mutations that cause cancer growth.
Biomarkers are key to tailoring specific treatments. Biomarkers are molecular patterns becoming more commonly used in colon cancer diagnosis, prognosis, and management. According to the National Cancer Institute, a biomarker is “a biological molecule found in blood, other body fluids, or tissues that is a sign of a normal or abnormal process, or a condition or disease,” such as cancer.
“In colon cancer, we’re starting to look more and more at people’s biomarkers, so we’re starting to take the cancers, sequence them, understand where the different mutations are to figure out whether or not someone has a normal gene here or an abnormal gene,” Dr. Yeo explained.
“Those are the areas that people want to be able to target a little bit more. We’re getting close to more of what we would call precision medicine, meaning we can start looking at people’s genetic mutations and think about how they might respond to different drugs.”
There are different types of biomarkers, including DNA, proteins, and genetic mutations found in blood, tumor tissue, or other body fluids. The biomarkers most commonly used in colon cancer management are:
- Genetic mutations within the tumor, such as MMR/MSI, KRAS, BRAF, and HER2
- Bloodstream carcinoembryonic antigen (CEA)
CEA is a protein produced by most tumor cells (but not all) and can be picked up in the bloodstream. High CEA levels do not establish a colon cancer diagnosis. However, higher CEA levels correlate with a worse prognosis and potential metastasis. Carcinoembryonic antigen is important for post-treatment follow-up to ensure the cancer hasn’t returned. Be sure to check with your doctor before treatment starts to ensure a CEA blood sample has been obtained.
More on Treating Colon Cancer
Surgery and chemotherapy are common approaches to colorectal cancer.
Some examples of Food and Drug Administration (FDA) approved chemotherapy drug treatments include:
- FOLFOX: leucovorin, 5-FU, and oxaliplatin (Eloxatin)
- FOLFIRI: leucovorin, 5-FU, and irinotecan (Camptosar)
- CAPEOX or CAPOX: capecitabine (Xeloda) and oxaliplatin
- FOLFOXIRI: leucovorin, 5-FU, oxaliplatin, and irinotecan
- Trifluridine and tipiracil (Lonsurf)
WATCH: Understanding Your Options with Metastatic Colon Cancer
Among metastatic colon cancer patients, multiple treatment options exist, including surgical and non-surgical options.
One treatment option includes an oral treatment called Fruquintinib, which is a targeted therapy for adults with metastatic colorectal cancer who have tried other treatments. Results from a trial published last year showed the drug improved overall survival and progression-free survival, which measures the amount of time before the cancer returns or spreads. It works by blocking the growth of blood vessels, which increases tumor growth.
Once you get to the metastatic setting, many patients “just run out of options,” Jennifer Elliott, head of solid tumors at Takeda, explained to SurvivorNet at the ASCO Annual Meeting. So it was critically important for Takeda to do this deal to in-license fruquintinib. We hope to give patients another option.”
Fruquintinib has been approved in China since 2018 and was originally developed by the Chinese biopharmaceutical company HUTCHMED. In January 2023, Takeda Oncology acquired the exclusive worldwide license for the drug outside of mainland China, Hong Kong, and Macau.
Questions to Ask Your Doctor
If you are facing a colon cancer diagnosis, here are some questions you may ask your doctor.
- What are my treatment options based on my diagnosis?
- If I’m worried about managing the costs of cancer care, who can help me?
- What support services are available to me? To my family?
- Could this treatment affect my sex life? If so, how and for how long?
- What are the risks and possible side effects of treatment?
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Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff
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