Cancer-Related Loss Featured on 'The Bachelorette'
- Michael Allio, 36, is a contestant on season 17 of The Bachelorette and he lost his wife to breast cancer in 2019.
- Breast cancer is typically detected via mammogram, which looks for lumps in the breast tissue and signs of cancer.
- Many people turn to therapy after losing their spouse or partner to cancer, as a way to process their grief.
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In a video posted to YouTube three years ago by Allio and his wife Lara (who was 32 at the time), they share their journey with viewers. Lara was diagnosed with stage 2 breast cancer in 2017 and passed from the disease in 2019.
In the video, Allio says, "We both agreed it's time I shared a little bit of the emotions we're going through. We are looking at shaving Lara's head in about 10 minutes here.”
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Allio comments on a struggle many with cancer face: Hair loss due to cancer treatment. He says, “Hair especially for women is very much associated with beauty and their self-image. I think we can all agree when we look at Lara, hair is not what makes her beautiful…She supports me in every way possible and is a wonderful mother to James."
How Is Breast Cancer Detected?
Breast cancer is typically detected via mammogram, which looks for lumps in the breast and early signs of cancer. In an earlier interview, Dr. Connie Lehman, the chief of Breast Imaging Division at Massachusetts General Hospital, underscores the need for pre-menopausal women to have their annual mammograms. It’s advised that women aged 45 to 54 who don’t have an elevated risk of breast cancer should have annual mammograms.
Related: Getting to Know Your Breasts with Self-Exams
For those with a higher risk of breast cancer, like people who have a family history of the disease, they should begin screening earlier. Dr. Lehman says, “If you haven’t gone through menopause yet, I think it’s very important that you have a mammogram every year. We know that cancers grow more rapidly in our younger patients, and having that annual mammogram can be lifesaving.”
“After menopause, it may be perfectly acceptable to reduce that frequency to every two years,” says Dr. Lehman. “But what I’m most concerned about is the women who haven’t been in for a mammogram for two, three, or four years, those women that have never had a mammogram. We all agree regular screening mammography saves lives.”
When Should I Get a Mammogram?
Coping with the Loss of a Loved One to Cancer
Many people turn to therapy after losing a loved one, like a partner or parent, to cancer, as a way to help process complex emotions that may arise during grief. Camila Legaspi lost her mother to breast cancer when she was in high school and turned to therapy to support her through that difficult period of loss.
In an earlier interview, she says, “Therapy saved my life. I was dealing with some really intense anxiety and depression at that point. It just changed my life, because I was so drained by all the negativity that was going on.”
Therapy helped Legaspi maintain perspective, she says. “Going to a therapist helped me realize that there was still so much out there for me, that I still had my family, that I still had my siblings. When you lose someone, it's really, really, really hard," says Legaspi. "I'm so happy that I talked to my therapist.”
"Therapy Saved My Life": After Losing A Loved One, Don't Be Afraid To Ask For Help
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