Caregiving For Loved Ones
- Singer-songwriter Halsey—who is living with endometriosis, systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE) [the most common type if lupus], and a rare T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder—is cherishing the time spent with her 51-year-old mom Nicole Frangipane, who is recovering from her second surgery following her recent breast cancer diagnosis.
- As for Halsey’s health struggles, she has T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder, which are a group of conditions affecting the lymphocytes, or while blood cells. They can be either genetic or viral infections. And depending on the type of disorder they can be either cancerous or noncancerous.
- She also as lupus, which is “a chronic (long-term) disease that can cause inflammation and pain in any part of your body.” “It’s an autoimmune disease, which means that your immune system, the body system that usually fights infections, attacks healthy tissue instead,” according to the Lupus Foundation of America.
- A caregiver may be a spouse, a parent, a sibling, a close friend, or a child. This special person often assumes multiple roles to make the life of their loved one battling cancer easier. Examples of caregiver activities may include attending doctor visits, helping the patient take notes and ask questions, providing transportation to treatment, and helping with everyday activities such as preparing meals.
- Being a caregiver is one of the most significant and challenging experiences a human can go through, and it’s important to not forget about your health as you dedicate a large part of your life to serving another.
- If you are caregiving for someone with cancer or another serious illness, this SurvivorNet guide can help you through.
In the photo shared on Instagram, Halsey, born Ashley Nicolette Frangipane, is seen with an IV in her arm and looking to be in good spirits while spending time with her mom, equipped with bandages on her chest.
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She continued, “I love her so much and she deserves far more comfort and happiness than the world is managing her at the moment. crafts, reading, and snacks at my house all autumn long.
“Is how we shall persevere.”
Other photos shared in Halsey’s carousel post featured a pile of books on a floor near a fireplace and piano, two adorable bird houses, a platter of holistic items like palo santo, sage, and herbs, as well as a shelf featuring the Catholic cross.
Although she didn’t specify the surgeries her mom had, we’re delighted to see Halsey taking the time to support her mom through her breast cancer journey, as she continues to deal with her own personal health struggles.
Expert Resources On Caregiving
- Caregiving Isn’t Easy; Recognize That You May Need Help
- Caregiving: An Opportunity for Healing
- ‘A Sacred and Blessed Calling’ – Managing Life As a Caregiver
- Caregivers Can’t Provide Optimal Care for Their Loved Ones with Cancer If They Don’t Care for Themselves
- Here Are Top Tips For Cancer Caregivers To Help Them Through The Process
- How to Be a Better Caregiver for Your Loved One
- Patrick Dempsey’s Advice to Cancer Caregivers: Take Care of Yourself, Too
Halsey’s post was praised with heartfelt comments from fans, with one writing, “Manifesting health and healing for you and your family always.”
Another fan wrote, “Best wishes for your mama Ashley. You girls are born to be strong fighters.”
While a third commented, “Sending all my love and healing energy. You both are so strong and inspiring!!!”
Halsey’s Health Struggles
Halsey, who goes by the pronouns she/they, recently told PAPER Magazine that her health struggles with lupus, a rare disorder, and endometriosis have all played a role in her newly released album “The Great Impersonator.”
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Referring to her rare diagnosis, she told the magazine, “I had a tiny little baby and I was on my tour, and it was my 28th birthday when I got the confirmation of my T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder diagnosis.
‘I had to stop asking the universe for sh*t. I had to just stop, because before this record, I remember being at home like, I have my perfect little family with my baby and my partner. What am I going to write about? I have nothing to write about.”
Halsey continued, “I’m always writing about conflict and tragedy and transgressions, and I felt that I didn’t have anything to write about. The universe was like, ‘Yeah? What about this?’”
She also commented on how doctors advised her that in order to heal, she would ned to stop working.
“It seemed unfair, because the answer was, ‘If you want this to go away, quit your job,’ she said, further questioning,“If I spawned in any other decade, or any other parallel universe, does it always go this way? Do I always end up Halsey? If I end up Halsey, do I always end up sick? I was playing out these alternate realities.”
Halsey also previously spoke about her struggle with endometriosis.
Endometriosis is a benign (non-cancerous) condition that occurs when tissue similar to the tissue that normally lines the inside of the uterus, known as the endometrium, grows on the outside of the uterus. Symptoms include pelvic pain, pain during sex, and heavy vaginal bleeding.
However, in addition to life with endometriosis, she is also living with T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder, which is a are a group of conditions affecting the lymphocytes, or while blood cells. They can be either genetic or viral infections. And depending on the type of disorder they can be either cancerous or noncancerous.
“These diseases often occur in immunocompromised individuals. There are two subsets of lymphocytes: T and B cells that regenerate uncontrollably to produce immunoproliferative disorders, which are prone to immunodeficiency, a dysfunctional immune system, and lymphocyte dysregulation,” an article published in the National Library of Medicine explains.
As for lupus, the Lupus Foundation of America, says it’s a “chronic (long-term) disease that can cause inflammation and pain in any part of your body” and “an autoimmune disease, which means that your immune system, the body system that usually fights infections, attacks healthy tissue instead.”
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Halsey has the most common type if lupus, known as systemic lupus erythematosus (SLE), however there are three other types of this disease. The other types are Cutaneous lupus (which is limited to the skin), Drug-induced lupus (which is caused by prescription drugs), and Neonatal lupus (a rare condition that affects infants of women with lupus).
In a June 5 post on Instagram, Halsey explained, “Thank you guys for the unbelievable amount of love for ‘The End’ and the support you’ve shown me since its release. I realize everyone is catching up with news I’ve held in for a very long time, and I wasn’t sure how much I wanted to share. You’ve all been so kind so I want to share a bit more.”
She continued, “In 2022, I was first diagnosed with Lupus SLE and then a rare T-cell lymphoproliferative disorder. Both of which are currently being managed or in remission; and both of which I will likely have for the duration of my life. After a rocky start, I slowly got everything under control with the help of amazing doctors.
“After 2 years, I’m feeling better and I’m more grateful than ever to have music to turn to. I can’t wait to get back where I belong: With you all. Singing and screaming my heart out.
Understanding Surgery For Breast Cancer Surgery
Once a person is confirmed to have breast cancer, it’s likely they will undergo some type of breast cancer surgery.
Although it’s unclear what type of surgeries Halsey’s mom underwent, it’s important to understand that the two main types of breast cancer surgery are a lumpectomy and mastectomy. A lumpectomy is where the surgeon only removes the cancerous area, along with a small margin of healthy tissue around it. During a mastectomy, all of the breast tissue is removed either in one breast (a single, or unilateral, mastectomy) or both breasts (a double, or bilateral, mastectomy).
“Traditionally, when a woman had breast cancer she [would need a] mastectomy, which was to have the breasts removed, but now for the past 40-50 years, we know instead you can do what is called a lumpectomy, where you go ahead and remove only the part of the breast that has the cancer,” Dr. Linda Moy, a radiologist at NYU Langone Health, tells SurvivorNet.
Whether a patient undergoes a lumpectomy versus a mastectomy is a very personal decision that can be affected by factors like the size of the tumor, its genetic markers and the patient’s family history.
Should I Have a Lumpectomy or Mastectomy?
In a previous conversation with SurvivorNet, Dr. Sarah Cate, a breast surgeon with Mount Sinai Health System, explained that “long-term survival with mastectomy is equivalent to that with lumpectomy and radiation.” Additionally, she says a mastectomy is “a much bigger surgery” with a “much longer recovery.”
People who need to undergo surgery for breast cancer should consider these factors and more before making concrete decisions about which procedure they will get.
Overall, the decision to get a lumpectomy or a mastectomy is a choice. Know that both of the procedures come with risks and the needs of each patient are different. Talk to your doctor about what type of surgery is right for you.
“There are some patients that come in, and right away they want both breasts removed,” Dr. Cate said. “But my job as the breast surgeon is to… stratify their risk, and say, do you have a strong family history of breast cancer? Do you have a strong family history of ovarian cancer? Should we be doing genetic testing on you to see if you’re at an extraordinarily high risk of breast cancer?
“And then to review their films with our radiologists and to decide, do they really need a mastectomy? So many patients will come in wanting both breasts removed, but we’ll end up with lumpectomy and radiation, which is really standard of care.”
Cancer Caregivers: The Basics
Assuming the role of a cancer caregiver when a spouse, parent, sibling, child, or friend is diagnosed with cancer comes with a unique set of responsibilities. The first thing to understand is that there is no shame is asking for help. This can be an overwhelming time for both patients and their caregivers, too.
Through interviews with expert oncologists, social workers, patients advocates, and more, we’ve come up with a checklist of helpful steps cancer caregivers can take throughout the journey.
Cancer caregivers may:
- Attend doctor visits with the patient
- Help the patient take notes/ask questions
- Provide transportation to and from treatment
- Accompany the patient during treatment
- Help keep track of side effects
- Link up with a social worker/patient navigator
- Help with day-to-day activities
- Provide emotional support
RELATED: Patrick Dempsey’s Advice to Cancer Caregivers: Take Care of Yourself, Too
How Cancer Caregivers Can Find Time to Care for Themselves
When you suddenly find yourself acting as a cancer caregiver, the lifestyle adjustment can be jarring. Many people welcome the role of cancer caregiver and the opportunity to help out someone they care about deeply but that doesn’t mean it’s easy.
Filling a caregiver role can be extremely stressful and caregivers often neglect their own needs, which can create a host of additional problems. Experts stress that you will be a better caregiver if you also prioritize caring for yourself. Taking care of your health whether that be with diet, exercise, or making time for activities you enjoy is still crucial.
Julie Bulger gives some tips on how caregivers can care for themselves
“It is important to have some things that you can do that’s kind of outside of the focus of caring for somebody that you love with cancer,” Julie Bulger, manager of patient and family-centered care at Vanderbilt-Ingram Cancer Center in Nashville, told SurvivorNet.
Bulger suggested caregivers find some activities that help them relax like taking a walk or going for a massage.
RELATED: Check Out SurvivorNet’s Resources on Mental Health
“There’s a lot of opportunities for support virtually through educational resources, support communities,” she added. “You can talk to somebody. You can get therapy virtually now.”
When a stressful life event occurs like a loved one being diagnosed with cancer people respond in a variety of ways.
“The way people respond is very variable,” Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik told SurvivorNet. “Very much consistent with how they respond to stresses and challenges in their life in general.”
When struggling with a new stressor, there are many different and healthy ways to cope. For some people, this may mean seeking out traditional therapy, but it’s not the only option.
Psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik discusses how people may respond to stressors in very different ways.
If you are struggling mentally due to the stress of being a cancer caregiver, there are many options to help you cope. These include:
- Seeking professional help from a psychiatrist or therapist
- Learning healthy coping skills
- Medication such as antidepressants
- Adding more physical activity to your routine
- Adjusting your sleep schedule
- Connecting with others via support groups
- Mindfulness and meditation
Support Matters
Having a strong community around you, as Halsey’s mom appears to have, with her daughter by her side, is ideal when challenged by health struggles.
Dealing with cancer or any sort of health battle for that matter can be overwhelming, so having physical and emotional support is crucial. That being said, it’s very important to know your limits on what you can handle as you undergo treatment and recover from your cancer, and that includes relationships.
“Going through [cancer] treatment is a very vulnerable and emotionally exhausting experience,” licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Marianna Strongin wrote in a column for SurvivorNet. “Noticing what you have strength for and what is feeling like too much, [is] extremely important to pay attention to as you navigate treatment.”
Dr. Strongin does note, however, that having people by your side during this “arduous chapter” of your life can be hugely beneficial.
“Studies have found consistently that loneliness is a significant risk factor for physical and mental illnesses and the trajectory of recovery,” she wrote. “Therefore, it will be important that you surround yourself with individuals who care and support you throughout your treatment.”
In a previous chat with SurvivorNet, psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik added that some cancer warriors may need to look beyond their existing relationships to find the support they need.
“Some people don’t need to go outside of their family and friends circle. They feel like they have enough support there,” Dr. Plutchik said. “But for people who feel like they need a little bit more, it is important to reach out to a mental health professional.”
Seeking Support: Dr. Plutchik Shares The First 3 Things To Do After a Cancer Diagnosis
Dr. Plutchik said it’s best to find a mental health professional with experience aiding people undergoing cancer treatment.
“Make sure that the mental health professional that you work it is reaching out, with your consent, to the rest of your team, to the oncologist, to the surgeon,” she said. “It can also be helpful to reach out to family, friends, and any other caretakers that may be involved in the person’s treatment.”
Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff
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