Kate Middleton's Cancer Journey
- As Catherine, Princess of Wales, widely known as Kate Middleton, is in remission from an undisclosed type of cancer, her husband Prince William has opened up about prioritizing open and honest communication with their three children.
- Last year, Middleton shared that an abdominal surgery she underwent in March led to the discovery that she had cancer. While she has not revealed the specific type, she did undergo and complete a course of chemotherapy.
- Parents living with cancer are encouraged to be as honest with their children as possible when explaining their condition with language that they can understand at their age.
- Licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Marianna Strongin encourages people with sick parents “to talk about your feelings with your immediate family as well as your parents.”
The 43-year-old Prince of Wales, explained to a Brazilian TV station this week, as per the British Newspaper The Independent, how he places honesty at the forefront of his wife’s undisclosed diagnosis in 2024, following an abdominal surgery she underwent.
Read MoreView this post on Instagram
Prince Williams continued, “Many questions might come up without answers … I think all parents go through that.
“There’s no rulebook for being a parent, and we chose to talk about everything.”
He added, according to The Independent, “Play dates, taxi driver, sports days, matches, playing in the garden when I can. School run most days. I mean Catherine and I share it, but she probably does the bulk of it.”
Expert Resources On Coping With a Cancer Diagnosis
- Taylor Swift Speaks Up About What It’s Like To Have A Parent With Cancer
- Facing a Cancer Diagnosis as a Single Parent: ‘I Knew I Had to Fight for My Life’
- Mental Health and Cancer — The Fight, Flight or Freeze Response
- SN & You Presents Mental Health: Coping With Emotions
- Telling Your Kids You Have Cancer: “When it Comes to Your Kids, You Want to Protect Them”
We’re glad to see that Prince William has been devoted to helping his children understand the situation, something that Middleton has also spoken about in the past on social media.
In an video clip shared on her social media pages, Middleton thanked everyone for their support after her abdominal surgery last year, saying, “It has been an incredibly tough couple of months for our entire family, but I’ve had a fantastic medical team who have taken great care of me, for which I am so grateful.
“In January, I underwent major abdominal surgery in London and at the time, it was thought that my condition was non-cancerous. The surgery was successful. However, tests after the operation found cancer had been present. My medical team therefore advised that I should undergo a course of preventative chemotherapy and I am now in the early stages of that treatment.”
View this post on Instagram
She added, “This of course came as a huge shock, and William and I have been doing everything we can to process and manage this privately for the sake of our young family.
“As you can imagine, this has taken time. It has taken me time to recover from major surgery in order to start my treatment. But, most importantly, it has taken us time to explain everything to George, Charlotte and Louis in a way that is appropriate for them, and to reassure them that I am going to be OK.”
“As I have said to them, I am well and getting stronger every day by focusing on the things that will help me heal; in my mind, body and spirits,” Middleton continued.
View this post on Instagram
Battling Cancer as a Parent
Opening up about cancer diagnosis with children can be really difficult task. You want to be honest with them and you want them to be prepared for what might happen, but at the same time you want to protect them, and be as gentle as possible.
John Duberstein, who lost his wife Nina to cancer, explains that he and his wife tried to take a progressive approach and be as open with their kids as possible. But as honest as they were, they ran into some issues with their kids understanding the disease. When Nina started to look healthier, for example, the kids assumed she was getting better, but that wasn’t the case.
Talking to Kids About Cancer: Be Open as Much as You Can
“It was a real eye-opening moment for two people who felt like they were dealing really head-on with this stuff, talking to the kids,” Duberstein told SurvivorNet in an earlier interview.
“So I think it’s important to be open with the kids as much as you can, as much as you feel like they can handle. But it’s also important to revisit it and not make assumptions. At the end of the night, what Nina had to tell them was, ‘I’m not ever going to get better. My cancer is not ever going to go away,’ it was hard for them to hear even though they’d already been prepared.”
Meanwhile, breast cancer survivor Gina de Givenchy previously spoke with SurvivorNet about going through cancer treatment as the mother of a 12-year-old girl.
“I felt it was important to mask it because I really wanted her to know that I was going to be OK. I didn’t want her to see me weak and sickly,” she said. “When it comes to your kids, I think you always want to sort of protect them.”
Telling Your Kids You Have Cancer ‘When it Comes to Your Kids, You Want to Protect Them’
The pressures of parenthood can be daunting during a cancer journey, but having little ones that depend on you can also provide another source of motivation to fight for your life.
Jovannie Lorenzo also knows this to be true. When she was diagnosed with colon cancer at 32, she felt an immense amount of fear because she was a single parent of her three kids. Going into her cancer battle, Lorenzo knew she would do everything in her power to be around to raise them.
“I knew that I had to do everything possible to be here for my children,” Lorenzo told SurvivorNet. “They are my saving grace. They are the reason I wake up every morning. They are the reason why I fight every single day and I make a choice to be positive, to be happy, and to move forward.”
Obviously, not every parent feels comfortable sharing so much about their diagnosis with their children. Some survivors have even told us that they were afraid to tell their family members, but as for Duberstein, de Givenchy, and Lorenzo, honesty was the best policy.
Licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Marianna Strongin encourages people with sick parents “to talk about your feelings with your immediate family as well as your parents.” She’s previously talked about the importance of expressing your feelings in her advice column for SurvivorNet.
“Talking about difficult things does not cause more anxiety,” Dr. Strongin said. “It is NOT talking about the very thing that we are all afraid or worried about that causes our body to feel dysregulated (unable to manage emotional responses or keep them within an acceptable range of typical emotional reactions) and anxious.”
Specifically, with patients who may be scared to talk to their children about a diagnosis, Strongin said children can pick up on their emotions, so it may help to check in with yourself beforehand.
“Having these conversations may bring up deep emotions you may have stowed away. There is nothing wrong with showing our emotions to children as long as we can remain calm and give them a sense of safety,” Dr. Strongin said.
Sharing Your Cancer News
For many people, revealing the news of their diagnosis is a way of coping, and receiving needed support for a cancer journey. However, it’s certainly a highly personal decision that should be undertaken on an individual basis.
Some people may choose to keep their diagnosis to themselves or close loved ones, and that’s equally respectable. Others may find strength and comfort in letting people know about their struggle. And that’s OK too.
Some people might find the process of sharing the news to feel like a burden and opt for something a little more separated from telling people face to face, like sharing the news on social media or a blog.
Deciding When and Who to Tell About My Diagnosis Became a Burden
Health is a deeply private matter, and it’s up to you and you alone to determine who has the right and privilege to know about your diagnosis.
For example, veteran NPR correspondent Ina Jaffe underscored this point in an essay she wrote a few years back.
“By the way, I have no issue with people who want to keep their cancer diagnosis a secret to the end. If you have the misfortune to have cancer, you get to have it any way you want,” wrote the NPR host.
Jaffe opened up about her decision that keeping her cancer diagnosis a secret “served me well.” Doing so meant that she “didn’t have to explain myself to friends and strangers while I was still in the hysterical stage,” she wrote.
Detailing the mental and emotional toll of her diagnosis, Jaffe says she stopped sleeping and eating, and she cried a lot. “I was grieving for my own life,” she said.
Dealing With Grief After a Cancer Diagnosis
Power of Support
A cancer diagnosis can be extremely stressful. One way SurvivorNet experts encourage cancer patients to alleviate some of that stress by leaning on their support system.
A support system can be made up of loved ones like family and friends. It can also be comprised of strangers who have come together because of a shared cancer experience. Mental health professionals can also be critical parts of a support system.
“Some people don’t need to go outside of their family and friend’s circle. They feel like they have enough support there,” psychiatrist Dr. Lori Plutchik told SurvivorNet.
“But for people who feel like they need a little bit more, it’s important to reach out to a mental health professional,” Dr. Plutchik added.
Dr. Plutchik also stressed it is important for people supporting cancer warriors to understand their emotions can vary day-to-day.
“People can have a range of emotions, they can include fear, anger, and these emotions tend to be fluid. They can recede and return based on where someone is in the process,” Dr. Plutchik said.
WATCH: How emotional health plays a role in the cancer journey.
Questions To Ask Your Children After a Diagnosis
- Do you know what cancer means, or would you like me to explain it?
- What questions do you have about my illness?
- How are you feeling about what’s happening right now?
- Would you like to talk about your feelings with someone else too—like a teacher, counselor, or relative?
- Are there things you’d like to keep doing together while I’m resting or recovering?
- Would you like to help me in small ways—like reading together, drawing, or keeping me company?
- What do you want to know about my treatment or recovery?
Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff
Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.
