Coping After Losing a Loved One to Cancer
- Actor John Travolta, 70, continues to grieve the loss of his late wife Kelly Preston, but it appears he may be open to love after loss, an insider revealed this week to Closer Weekly.
- Preston passed away at age 57 after a 2-year battle with breast cancer. Since her passing, Travolta has been a single dad to their children, Ella Bleu Travolta, 24, and Benjamin Travolta, 13.
- Grief is a difficult, truly personal process, something Travolta has shown. Some find solace in vulnerability and sharing how they feel with others.
- While working through grief and vulnerable tackling of the emotions that accompany it, some find tools like therapy to be helpful. For others, support groups or turning to faith may be helpful.
- Whichever methods of support you look for after loss, you should know that there is no correct way to grieve. There is no perfect timeline for grieving, either.
Travolta, who has been a single parent since his late wife’s heartbreaking passing in July 2020, has reportedly been “flirty” with his “Cash Out” co-star Kristen Davis, 59, during filming of the new action/adventure movie set to premiere in theaters on April 26.
Read MoreThe unidentified source claimed Travolta “had a blast” filming the upcoming movie with Davis, noting, “but all anyone can talk about is their chemistry.”
And as for what Travolta’s 24-year-old daughter Ella and 13-year-old son think, the source says, “The most surprising people on the John and Kristin romance bandwagon are John’s kids, Ella and Ben.
“While no one could replace their mom, they think Kristin is great and that their dad should get back out there and start having fun.”
View this post on Instagram
Earlier this month, insiders offered some insight into Travolta and Davis’ relationship, telling Closer Weekly, “People who’ve seen them together say it’s obvious he’s totally smitten.
“[Davis] has been saying John’s a cool guy and telling people how funny he is. John’s been gushing to everyone that Kristin’s smart and beautiful. Their friends think they’re perfect for each other and that if John doesn’t take a chance, he’ll miss out on a great opportunity.”
The source said Davis “would definitely be receptive … but she won’t make the first move, so hopefully John can get his courage up.”
The unknown insider also noted that Travolta “has been ready to date for a while, but always seems to chicken out when it comes down to it.”
John Travolta’s Loss & Kelly’s Breast Cancer Battle
John Travolta lost wife Kelly Preston in July 2020. She fought her breast cancer privately for two years before passing from the disease at age 57.
While we don’t know the specifics of Preston’s treatment, we do know that breast cancer is typically treated with chemotherapy, radiation, or surgery.
View this post on Instagram
After she passed, Travolta thanked doctors at MD Anderson Cancer Center in Houston in a tribute post for his wife on Instagram on July 13, 2020.
Alongside a beautiful photo of his wife, Travolta wrote, “It is with a very heavy heart that I inform you that my beautiful wife Kelly has lost her two-year battle with breast cancer. She fought a courageous fight with the love and support of so many.
“My family and I will forever be grateful to her doctors and nurses at MD Anderson Cancer Center, all the medical centers that have helped, as well as her many friends and loved ones who have been by her side.”
View this post on Instagram
He continued, “Kelly’s love and life will always be remembered. I will be taking some time to be there for my children who have lost their mother, so forgive me in advance if you don’t hear from us for a while. But please know that I will feel your outpouring of love in the weeks and months ahead as we heal. All my love, JT.”
Travolta and his wife kept Preston’s cancer battle mostly private, which is why the world was so stunned when she passed.
Health is a deeply personal matter, and it’s up to you and you alone to determine who has the right and privilege to know about your diagnosis.
It’s important to do what feels right to you after your diagnosis, and not cave into any pressure to share your diagnosis with others before you’re ready or to share it more widely than you’d like. You have autonomy over your health and the sharing of any news related to it.
More Resources On Coping With Loss
- Dealing With Grief Related to Health Problems
- How to Handle the Emotional Toll of Caring for a Loved One With Cancer: Prioritizing Your Mental Health
- Mental Health: Understanding the Three Wellsprings of Vitality
- Mental Health and Cancer — The Fight, Flight or Freeze Response
- How to Be Realistically Optimistic: Coping With Mental Health Long-Term
- Mental Health: Coping With Feelings of Anger
Dr. Marianna Strongin, a licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Strong In Therapy Psychology, told SurvivorNet in an earlier interview that whether someone shares this heavy news is their personal preference.
“I recommend sharing, I’m a therapist,” Strongin says with a laugh, “but to whom and how many people is up to the person (with cancer).”
There are plenty of people who have chosen not to share their cancer battle publicly. While Strongin says that she encourages sharing, she also recognizes there’s also a personality factor at play when it comes to whether a person shares this deeply personal news. Some people are more willing to share, and some are just more private, Strongin adds. The difference, she says, is what’s the process in sharing versus not sharing.
Moving Through Grief
Grief is a difficult, truly personal process, something Travolta has shown. Some find solace in vulnerability and sharing how they feel with others.
Therapy Saved My Life’: After Losing A Loved One, Don’t Be Afraid To Ask For Help
While working through grief and vulnerable tackling of the emotions that accompany it, some find tools like therapy to be helpful. Support groups can also be a benefit for those who are feeling isolated in their feelings of grief, as can turning to faith.
Whichever methods of support you look for after cancer loss, you should know that there is no correct way to grieve. There is no perfect timeline for grieving, either.
Surviving the Loss of a Partner
Fighting your own cancer battle is one of the toughest experiences in life; watching the disease take someone you love is a different kind of pain. In some cases, a spouse with cancer can take proactive steps to talk about what might come after.
John Duberstein, who lost his wife, writer Nina Riggs, to metastatic triple negative breast cancer told SurvivorNet that while he was watching her suffer from the disease, he couldn’t help but wish things could go back to normal — but Riggs had already embraced her new normal.
RELATED: The Toughest Conversations: Losing a Spouse to Cancer
“I really wanted things to go back to normal, whatever that meant,” Duberstein said. “She was not for that. She wanted to embrace the existence that she had, even before she knew she was going to die imminently. I did not want to talk about what was going to happen with me after Nina died. Nina is the one that really brought it up, she brought it up a number of times.”
Duberstein explained that even with the pain of losing his wife, and even though he didn’t want to talk about it at the time, he’s so glad they had those seemingly uncomfortable conversations. “In retrospect, I can’t even explain how glad I am that I had that.”
This is a reminder that having those uncomfortable and painful conversations with your partner can be fundamental to your well-being as you move forward in the grieving process, alleviating the guilt felt in starting to date again, and/or eventually marry.
Contributing: SurvivorNet Staff
Learn more about SurvivorNet's rigorous medical review process.
